What in the world just happened to me?

real opinions about my new life as a mom

I resolve to do a lot of things this year January 3, 2007

Filed under: resolutions — jeanrivaldi @ 4:52 am

So it’s new year’s resolution time. I love this time of year. It’s a clean slate, a do-over. It’s like shaking the etch-a-sketch clean, sort of.

I’ve got a whole buttload of resolutions this year just like I do every year. This year though, after just having a baby, I’m realizing my list isn’t quite as lofty as usual. Years past I’ve had giant aspirations and goals. This year I’m going for the simple, the attainable, the mundane

Top of the list is to lose my baby weight and get back in shape ASAP. I’ve been innundated lately with moms and non-moms, men, doctors, mother-in-laws and everyone else telling me ‘it took 9 months to gain the weight and it will take at least 9 months to get rid of it.’ They tell me to be patient. They tell me that probably the reason I haven’t even lost one pound for 8 weeks is because I’m gaining muscle and muscle weighs more than fat. They tell me I look beautiful and not to worry about it. God bless them, they’re just trying to help.

But I still feel fat and squishy. About 10 weeks post-partum I would cry when I got out of the shower and saw myself in the mirror. I’m slowly getting over that. I don’t cry about it as much anymore. But I don’t in any way want to get to acceptance of myself like this. Because it is not acceptable — to me anyway.

Moms….why didn’t you tell me that I should not indulge my craving for ice cream while I was pregnant? That I should not really gain any weight during the first trimester because that weight is just plain old fat? That I needed at all costs to continue exercising up until the very last minute the baby popped out? Why, why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you tell me that a 3-week Skittles binge was totally unacceptable?

O.k. maybe some of you did tell me and I wasn’t listening. But here I am…and as I’m all about full disclosure in this blog, here are my stats for the moms out there. Before pregnancy I was 5’11” and 137 pounds. That was my happy weight. During my pregnancy I gained roughly 58 pounds. I say roughly because around week 36 I stopped looking at the scale and don’t know what the final final was. Now at 20 weeks post partum I am still 5’11” (imagine that) and 165 pounds. I’ve got a long way to go. And I am trying hard — walking, pilates, daily situps, counting calories, but to no avail it seems.

O.k. enough on that resolution, though it is my obvious priority.

I also resolve to try to stop obsessing about the laundry. I do the laundry every day. It started when the baby came because I was doing a load of baby laundry every day and then I started doing our laundry every day too and now if a few days go by without doing the laundry I feel as though a volcano of dirty clothes is growing in the corner of our bedroom, just waiting to spew. I know it’s not a big deal if the clothes are dirty in the hamper, but then I put a load in anyway.

I resolve to make dinner once a week. It seems so simple really. But ever since Jack was born, I’ve had a really hard time getting anything that resembles a meal on the table or even onto a plate that is then taken to the couch in front of the t.v. Frozen pizzas have been my attempt at dinner. And I really like frozen pizzas and I think my husband does too. But, maybe some variety would be good. It’s a goal anyway.

I resolve to subscribe to People magazine because I always buy it at the grocery store and it would save a lot of money if I just broke down and got a subscription.

I resolve to quit my job, which is going to be a no-brainer, since I plan to do it on Monday.

I resolve to get a Donna Martin Graduates t-shirt this year. I have always wanted one, having grown up on Beverly Hills 90210. I saw it in a magazine about 3 years ago and there’s no need to put it off any longer.

I resolve not to pull a Britney Spears and get pregnant again right away. We do want another kid, but we’d like to catch our breath first and maybe get Jack a little closer to potty training before #2 comes along. I can’t even imagine getting pregnant again at 3 months post partum or whatever she was. How do you even recover from the first one? Anywho…not on my list of things to do this year…

I resolve not to make anymore resolutions. If I accomplish even half the things on this page I will be quite pleased with myself come 2008.


Hello world! December 31, 2006

Filed under: new mom,Uncategorized,why am I here — jeanrivaldi @ 3:03 pm

I’m leaving the wordpress assigned title to this first blog, because really what else am I going to say?

I feel like I should explain my purpose for being here, don’t you? Well it’s fitting that I start this blog on the last day of 2006. A lot has happened to me this year. Mostly good things — I got married and had a baby. And some weird things — all pregnancy and baby related. And some not so good things — job related. Anywho…all through my pregnancy and first few months postpartum I kept saying “i should start a blog and let people know what I think about all this baby stuff'”. Which is not to say that that’s all I’ll be writing about, but it does consume my daily thoughts right now. So the blog will probably evolve as I do and of course isn’t that what good blogs do?

My son is 4.5 months right now and I’ve spent the last four months being slightly (and some days more than slightly) pissed off at new moms everywhere. Why? Because we tend as a group not to tell the truth. To our single or married kidless friends, we glorify the whole experience and leave out the gory details. To our other new mom friends we are in a competition for everything….to see who breastfed longest, who lost weight soonest, who had sex first, whose kid is bigger, smarter, talking or walking first. So my main intent is to tell the truth. Not because I want to discourage anyone from having a kid — certainly not! I love my little nutterbutter more than life itself — but I sure would have been more prepared for what was going to happen to me if my friends and acquaintances had just told the truth.

If you’re a mom, you probably can relate to what I’m saying. You know the whole “oh, I don’t even remember the birth…”, or “I don’t think sex was different after the baby….” or “I don’t even remember the first six weeks…”

And to all that I say — bullshit!!! You remember — yes you do. Somewhere in your little sleep-deprived, brain-fogged mommy mind….you remember all the gory details and I think it’s your duty and mine to pass them on. Maybe you’re not like me and you’d rather not know. But, I would rather be prepared. So I’m putting this disclaimer out there. If you’re thinking about getting pregnant or are pregnant and would rather be surprised about what is about to happen to you….you can stop reading now. That’s my fair warning.

Of course, as they say (and who are they?), every pregnancy and birth and kid is different, so this is just my account of what happened to me.